HI there, beer fest anyone? Not exactly audio marketing, or radio online or off for that matter, but all in the name of research.

WOODIES, has been a favourite haunt of mine for a while in New Malden, and this weekend, they are having (still are as I write) A beer fest.

They are also raising money for the Shooting Star Hospice, one of my favourite local charities. Pictures below, well done to all involved-it’s a manic weekend for the staff, 3 days non stop- they start planning this thing in February!

In the fund raising tent, spot the Radio Jackie T shirts in the background

I keep the best company. Sheep or Welsh leisure centre. You decide!

Awww

Last one in the tent is a loser....

Derek, one of the staff, and a thoroughly nice chap.

Look at the kegs on that. I had a very nice scrumpy like cider as well. Hic.

Abby and Magda behind the bar in Woodies.

Jake, Rob, Lara and Linda the landlady.

Neils news for Friday.

Nicky’s back on the show, welcome back Nix.

One week to go until the official launch on Womens Radio of Your internet profits radio show.com, a show talking to internet marketing supremos, so if you are slogging away online with no success yet, it could be the show for you. The guests we have on are relateable and nice as well, ‘cos that’s important. Just as a teaser we have Nicola Cairncross star of The Money Gym, and Martin Avis author of one of the most popular , honest and relateable internet marketing newsletters, kickstart daily.

Nicola has been giving me some lessons as well on internet marketing, it really is a never ending education, I do recommend her by the way, as well as Money Gym membership- if you want more “financial intelligence”, I thoroughly reccommend her. She’s lovely as well.

Couple gigs coming up that I am looking forward to, next Friday at Club Viva. Mick Brown, my Radio Jackie colleague is there this Friday, me, next Friday.

if you go to the website www.clubviva.co.uk, you can get in for nothing. Shhhhh!

Music wise it’s old and new, put it this way, my set last week inccluded Dizzie Rascal, Guru Josh, Pink, and Ben E King! Seriously. Perhaps see you there next Friday.

The next Saturday, 28th…. Summer Live Music Fest, presented by me and my radio co-presenter Nicky Patrick. The line up is amazing, McFly, Basshunter, Chipmunk, Tinchy Strider, Alisha Dixon, the Wanted, Stacey Soloman, Roll Deep.

What a line up.

You can still get tickets if you’re quick- www.summerlivemusicfest.com

Nicky and I are making a podcast of the event, which I will post, shameless plug, if you wanted a promo podcast made for your event, product, service or website, I would be delighted to help. www.mypodcastsonlineco.uk Podcast marketing and audio marketing at it’s best!

I recently helped a hypnotherapist/healer lady in Hayling Island start her own radio show, she will be on Womens Radio as well, with some fascinating “mental” journeys.

Good luck Tina – if you are up for your own radio online show, just get in touch.

You know Maureen as in 118212, you can now ask any question you want, silly or serious. I asked her out, texted “Hey Maureen, how about a hot date”

The reply- I am a corporation, and therefore cannot go out on dates of any kind.

I think she’s just playing hard to get, don’t you?

Club Viva http://www.vivanightclub.co.uk/

Back in Clubland again, and lovin it.

Me, and one of my favourite colleagues Mick Brown who does the Drive show on JACKIE, and is a Dj superstar in my eyes are doing some gigs at Club Viva in Richmond

http://www.vivanightclub.co.uk/

Nice club, I played a set including Dizzee, Faithless and Ben E King. Diverse.

Piccies below, and the dates me and Mick are there.

Thanks to Glen, their resident DJ for making me so welcome as well, what a nice chap.

HI to Ian Mills as well, and the door staff thanks for the welcome. Great bunch of people.

Oh, and if you go to the guest list you can get in freeeee!

http://www.vivanightclub.co.uk/

Glen. A very good DJ, thanks for the welcome

DATES:

Fri 20th Mick

Fri 27th Neil

SEP

Fri 3rd Mick

Fri 10th Neil

Fri 17thNeil

F ri 24th Mick

 One more thing to do. Drive over to the other side of the island, to Cafe Mambo, where they play ambient music as the sun goes down, then party in one of the many cool bars, where name DJ’s play.

And Bob Sinclair would be that DJ for tonight, one more we had to see, especially as he was playing at Cafe Mambo, on the front in Ibiza, where they play ambient music as they watch the sun go down, then the party starts. And name DJ’s do a set, Fedde le Grande has been there, Roger Sanchez too, and tonight Bob Sinclar. (I have seen both spellings, you say Sinclar, I say Sinclair…)

"World.. hold on, Go On Bob" And get your hair cut!

We missed the sunset (darn that nature, would not wait for us), but Bob was good. Apart from a really dodgy version of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”,

But… being the last night, Ashlea decided she wanted to spend it at The Pink Panther.

So, we dropped the car off, an dropped in for, umm, just one…

The epitome of cool, yes? You cant see it that well in the piccie, but they are glasses with flashing rims, and a flashing plastic ring, bought from the guys that patrol the strip selling hats (bought one), sunglasses (no) and designer umm, watches. I bought Ashlea a “Gucci”, and bought myself a meaty looking one, where the strap has since broken.

Anyway, the flashing glasses, the ring and the “Dad dancing” was too much for any 16 year old, so… (see pic below)

Disowned!

Hypocrite!

I had a great time, and so did Ashlea, and she will kill me for saying this in public, but I love you!

You rock, and thanks for being such a great daughter.

Ashleas friend Josh has a house in Ibiza, and we were invited over there, really nice house and people, one that I used to work with at Safeways in New Malden when I was Ashleas age. At ten ish the “kids” decided they wanted to large, so we went into town.

And they got free tickets for Es Paradis. Next to Eden. Nicely done lads.

(Great bunch of lads btw, Josh, Aaron and Sam)

And two legends , not one, but two were playing there that night, Guru Josh, and Esta Noche. The guru I am familiar with, as he is the artist behind oneof my favourite dance anthems ever- Infinity. Recently remixed as well for the noughties. Esta Noche not heard of, perhaps some Spanish legend.

large large large large large

The guru in action. Bloody good DJ, played the keyboards as well.

We have the mark...

This is not footage of the night, but incase you are wondering what “Infinity” sounds like, here is a version. Wow, that sax!

So, that was Guru Josh, we never saw Esta Noche.

And we were not likely to, that means “tonight” in Spanish!

What a berk.

Return of the Mac?

 Went for a drive yesterday afternoon. Over to the hippy market as you know. Saw this sign on the way back, which appealed to Ashlea.

We came, we saw we larged.

But before we did that we had a meal in a restaurant, who had 2 speeds, slow and stop. But Ashlea did take a clever picture of the placemat.

Just turn left at the beer stain.

We got the boat to Eden, the other side of San Antonio.

Me and Ashlea, and a bunch of party people, crossing from a happening part of the Island to a MEGA happening part of the Island.

And it was on the boat, that the quote of the day was created. More on that at the end of this post.

Ashlea looked great. She has the irritating style of being able to carry off many fashion looks easily and effortlessly.

Must have got it from me. Seriously.

So, we are waiting for her friends, 3 guys she met on Facebook since we’ve been here.

Just kidding! I just wanted to see your hands fly up in horror.

No, it is 3 of her friends from home, who happen to be here. Cool eh. And she would rather enter the Club with them, than just with me. I can understand that. No one wants to be outshone by their Dad’s uber coolness. So she needs a little backup.

Captain LARGE and the Largettes (I made that up)

Nice bunch of lads actually. And out for a good time. Well you don’t come to Ibiza to pick flowers do you?

So, the early set in Eden, well it’s not commercial, the kind of thing that elderly people would describe as “Boom boom repetitive rubbish”, but  I kinda liked it even though I am a commercial boy at heart. But then, because of the price of the drinks,  ten euros for a Vodka andRed Bull, yep,. that much, we went out to find a cheaper deal, intending to come back for the Pendulum set at 4.

Ashleas friends found a good place where the DJ was playing an amazing commercial set, and we went back for Pendulum at 4. Wow, hearing Propane Nightmare – clubland loud was amazing. The place went absolutely mad.

Cost 5 euros to go out and come back again. The cheek of it. Cool stamp though.

Recovering today.

Ashlea by the pool.

Oh, the quote of the day.

Good looking boy to Ashlea on boat talking about me ” Is that a friend of yours”

Ashlea “Uhhmm yeah, kindof”

More tomorrow.

Mad northern woman did not get me.

Oh, by the way, me and Ash went for a Chinese last night:

I'll have the cream of "Sum Yung Guy"

By the way, you say thank you in Chinese by saying “Che Che” (spelling dodgy)

Be kind of funny if you were saying thankyou for the Tai Chi

Chi Che Che!

So, next morning dawns, and we went to the hippy market. Apparantly in the 60′s a ban of people who believed in free love all lived here, and so they could conrtibute to the economy, offered the chance to sell their stuff. And they do so today too. Sell their stuff that is. The love now costs 20 euros. So someone told me.

Hippy House? I reckon Tinky Winky lives next door.

"I wanna be a hippy..."

Tonight we go to Eden, one of the most happening places on the Island. Me, and all the cheesy quavers.

If I do not blog tomorrow, you will know I didn’t make it.

HAPPENING!!! LARGE!! SICK! MAJOR!

I can do this shit.

Quote for the day

“I cant believe you just did that Daddy”

Oh come on.

I said yesterday, we moved rooms, well it just so happens, that if I vault over the balcony (ground floor remember),  walk through some bushes, about 5 metres, there is a nice kids pool. Perfect for a midnight swim.

Daddy no!

Too late baby.

As I do it, there are some other guys larging it in the sea. Disgusting behaviour. At least I use a pool to large.

As I large, well swim a length- very refreshing actually, I can hear a woman shouting in a Northern Accent “I’ll see you’s tomorrow”.

I don’t know if she meant me or the people in the sea, but she sounded really pissed off. Perhaps envying my physique. Hey baby.

Tomorrow we go to Eden. The club to the “reclaim the dance floor night”. And the hippy market, where we can browse for trinkets made by people that believe in free love.

What kind of Dad am I really for taking my daughter to the hippy market.

Until tomorrow.

(If mad Northern Woman hasn’t got me)

Ah, on my familliar keyboard now….

That’s better.

EDUCATING ASHLEA

Ashee asked me about Spanish, and I enlightened her with my instant translation from English to Spanish, just add “os” to the end of everything.

Tabacos

Beeros

Foodos

What you staring at. Os.

Kinda works.

We moved room. On the first night, we could still hear people larging it, at 5 in the morning. Not that I dislike that sound, I find the sound of a “party in the distance” kinda comforting , like rain against the window, but this was a bit different. All the normal largers had gone home, and just a few weird ones with a strange look in their eye were left. Not good or conducive to my beauty sleep, so we moved to the sister hotel next door, downstairs, with a sea view, and a nice balcony, with REALLY loud crickets, and a beautiful nighttime view, with all the boats lit up. Glorious.

Hired a car yesterday morning.

Got my first parking ticket in the evening.

What’s the similarity between a traffic warden and a stork.

They can both stick their bills up their assos.

Quote of the day “You complete slapper” Don’t ask.

Ashlea decided to see what it was really like to pretend to be a rabbit in headlights.

Ashlea and Jane from The Pink Panther bar (Ashlea does not work there. Yet.)

Ibiza at dusk. Perfect time for a rousing chorus of "Show me the way to go home". They love it.

Darn this keyboard, its not quite the same as the ones in the UK,  i can do a <, but not the opposite, and to get the “at” as in the a with a squiggle ampersand, theres a weird move that i have not mastered yet.

//// Ah there´s the bloody forward slash.

Any way, a young at heart me on holiday in Ibiza with a 16 year old cool daughter, Ashlea. Hmmm, a volatile combo possibly. So we decided to blog about it and do quote fço the day. That word was meant to be “for” but i left it in to show the cute accent underneath.

I will buy a digital camera tonight and upload some piccies, but in the meantime, I enclose a piccie of the hotel, (you need to click on the link, I cannot upload piccies here) which incidentally as we walked in  last night at 3 in the morning smelled of sick.

http://www.tobook.com/photos/6676_club-san-remo-sestanyol%20SAN%20REMO3.jpg

I said “That´s sick” and Ashlea thinking I was speaking Teen said “Whats good about it?!”

So our tale begins about 12 hours ago when we were at Luton airport, dropped off by Mum and Dad, (thanks guys), and we saw a bus. Waiting about 3 paces from where we were dropped off at. Now being a London lad, and being used to things being on the big side at airports, we figured that it was the bus to take us to the terminal building I mean come on Heathrow and Gatwick have whole perimeter roads for goodness sake. so we dutifully got on the bus.

Ashlea, ever observant, noticed after a while:

1. Luton was a bloody big airport, and this was a long drive.

2 Luton airport was pretty and all encompassing including on our drive, beautiful fields, cute country pubs, the odd herd of cows.

Either that, or…..

Inspector Clouseau would be proud!

20 minutes later, we pulled up in the official airport long term park and ride. 20 minutes away from the terminal. We could have walked it in all of 2 minutes.

“Scuse me m8″ whch bus goes back first.”

“That one. Where you parked?

“Ummmmmm”

Nice flight, we sat next to a nice lady called “Maureen” who told us about her friends that owned 2 bars opposite where we were staying, one of which is called The Pink Panther.

So we arrive, and decide to go over the Pink Panther.

Quote for the day from me to Ashlea

“Where the f— did you learn to neck shots like that??”

More tomorrow.

Ooerr missus

Gorgeous. And that's just me.